Keir Starmer took to the stage at the Labour conference and delivered a speech that, frankly, sounded — and read — like it was drafted by AI, in a word salad mash up of Yes, Minister’s Sir Humphry and 1984’s O’Brien
He’s no Margaret Thatcher or Tony Blair, both orators of undeniable charisma, so we can’t blame him for seeking a little assistance, but the repetition of vague, lofty terms, surreal “new country” rhetoric and emotionally flat, and peculiar syntax was one of his more robot-like efforts.
Renewal, according to Starmer, is “long,” “difficult,” “not cost-free or easy,” and “not always comfortable.” It sounds awful. And at the end of this hard road, what do we get? A new country. But we didn’t want a new country. Can we, in the old, nice country we prefer, just reduce immigration pressures, start exploiting our own natural energy resources, and enjoy a reasonably comfortable and easy life, please?
In this mysterious new country, we get to wave flags proudly. We’re virtually told to wave them! (Yvette Cooper must be having nightmares.) But he completely misunderstands why people hoisted flags on lampposts and bridges and painted on roundabouts up and down the country for Operation Raise the Colours. It was about celebrating the country we have, not commissioning a new one.
Starmer wants us to believe our country is beautiful, tolerant, and diverse. And yes, it is all those things, but those aren’t the values that have defined Britain across generations. Fundamental British values are democracy, the rule of law and liberty. Our island nation has also gifted the word an unparalleled inventive, pioneering, artistic spirit.
“Tolerant” and “diverse”? That’s a command, not a creed: “Be good children, wave your flags for this new country you don’t recognise anymore. Wave harder! Be tolerant, children!”
And “beautiful”? This from the man who is ruining life for the long-suffering British farmer really sticks in the craw. He wants small family-run hedgerow- lined farms run into the ground. To be replaced by what? Big corporate farms? Solar panels? Insect factories? I have no idea, except I have a feeling I won’t like it nearly so much as the patchwork of traditional farming fields that have defined our landscape for centuries.
But it was the claim that he wants to serve the whole of our country, that made me laugh. (Bitterly, mind.) We all know he prefers Davos to Westminster — he said so. To serve in Westminster is an honour, rooted in a tradition of democracy dating back to the Anglo-Saxon witan. Remember the Anglo-Saxons, Keir, that ethnic group so foundational to Englishness, the one we’re told by academics either didn’t exist or is racist?
It’s easier to call critics of mass immigration racist than accept the public’s deep discontent with untrammelled immigration. Serving the country means remembering Reform voters exist, Keir. Reform’s proposal to scrap Indefinite Leave to Remain has resulted in a surge in voting intentions.
Polls suggest roughly a third of the country would vote Reform — more than the fifth who voted Labour. Meanwhile, Labour’s conference speeches full of vindictive and inciteful swipes at Reform appear to have cost the party five points in voting intentions. It seems that Starmer was right about one thing: people really are fed up with the politics of “division” and “grievance”.
Here’s a final stat for you: I ran Starmer’s speech through ChatGPT which reckons that there’s roughly a 75–80 % chance this speech had significant AI assistance — which explains why it sounded like an eerie robot manifesto.
Careful Laura. Herr Starmer has identified the "enemy" (anyone not voting for him?) and your critique is unlikely to put you in the "decent" citizen category as we enter the final battle, the one for the nation's soul apparentley.
Anyone tempted by Reform (a lawful political party) is worse than racist according to the Home Secretary though she did not name what was worse. Satanism perhaps? Baby killers? No, can't be that as Mahmood attended a rally for Hamas and Palestinian ethno-nationalism (the only kind allowed). Must be Satanism then. Keep an eye out for local covens then.
Farage flirted with Hitler youth according to David Lammy. Quite a feat as Farage was born long after the Nazis.
Labour has lost its mind. I cannot recall lawful, political opponents being characterised as "the enemy", a statement of essence and lack of moral worth not disagreement over policy differences that used to be the norm. A domestic version of the Charlie Kirk murder just became a bit more likely. So irresponsible unless civil strife is the aim in order to justify the increased surveillance planned. I no longer wholly discount such theories. Instilling fear is the governing narrative.
Perfect commentary on the reality of the situation !! I think he is totally bought and paid for, and it shows with every utterance. Is he a clone? There is zero registering in that Davos brain of his… in a way its good that it is becoming more obvious daily! Might wake up those with any doubts.